Sunday, December 28, 2014

The last few days - Birthday no. 32

Birthdays have always been very special to me. On mine, I want to feel special; on someone else's, I like to make them feel happy! This birthday of mine was no exception. Although it has been some 40 days, I think I need to report here so that I never forget how awesome I felt on that particular day!

So it started some 2-3 days before the big day. I had told the Boy that this year you have to 'surprise' me with a phone. Although I wanted the M8, I had to make do with an S5 because the Boy has M8 and we cannot have two similar phones at home. I didn't ask for an iPhone 6. It's such a fad and I really want to stay away from anything that serves a herd mentality. I mean really... people buy an iPhone and show it off like it's some kind of a status symbol. Why, oh, why!? Anyway, so I told him I wanted a black S5 as a 'surprise' gift! Ofcourse there was a surprise element here. I didn't know when I will receive it!! Like an obedient husband, he bought me one a few days prior to my birthday and I told everyone how I got a 'surprise' gift!!

Basically the last few months had been tormenting. Every husband around me was surprising his wife. Now I am a normal human being with little bit of extra jealousy factor in me. And then there is this added pressure of answering the question - so what did he give you this year? So, you know, I had to plan my surprise! When I told my mom that he usually doesn't buy me any gifts, her reply was - he has given you such a beautiful life, what else do you want?

Hmm!! Why do mothers always favour the son-in-law?

Coming back to the birthday... a few friends bought me a cake at 12 in the night. My school friends did that awesome con-call that we do at 12 in the night. Did I mention that before? My three absolutely gorgeous friends and the fabulous me have tried to make this a tradition. I remember when we were in school -  we use to call each other at 12 to wish. So, to keep the kid in us alive, we do a con-call from different parts of the world on each other's birthdays. Believe me, those 5 minutes are the most precious. We laugh like crazy and just talk nonsense. We do need to hang up because husbands are usually waiting trying to understand what the fuss is about! And believe me, this con-call thing is very hard to organize on other days. We are all so busy. So this birthday thing is most dear to me.

The next day I took phone calls as usual and just chatted a lot. A friend of mine invited me to lunch at her place and treated me with the yummiest pav-bhaji I've had in a long time. Another friend took a half day at work and picked me up to go to a third friend's place. As soon as I entered, I saw a decorated home with a surprise cake.

Did I tell you my greatest blessing are my friends?

The Boy took me out for dinner in the evening. We went to this fabulous water-front restaurant and talked away to glory. He knows how excited I am on my birthday and so, he really made me feel like a princess. He said yes to all my orders. I also told him that I want to celebrate my birthday twice a year and he readily agreed! Oh, what a day!

And yes, one of my friends even wrote me a poem!

Did I tell you that the greatest gifts cannot be bought? These small gestures stay in your heart and keep you happy forever. And that's why I believe what my mom says - a beautiful life is indeed the most precious gift that you can give anyone.

Here's to many more birthdays like this one. May you have the same happiness :)

A sneak peak into my fabulous 32!!

P.S. I am not sorry if this reads like a 16-year old's birthday post. Be prepared to read similar ones in the years to come!

Sunday, December 21, 2014

Just Being Me

As I lay in my bed thinking what I have done
Told the truth to my love, second to none.
Transparency in everything – that’s how I wanted my marriage to begin.
Then why am I made to believe that I’ve committed a sin?

You loved me with all your heart,
Promised - ‘til death do us part.
I vowed to be faithful, respectful and a loving wife.
You are now, and forever will be, my life.

Then why a fragment from my past shook you like this?
What made you so skeptical that you won’t even kiss?

I've told you about Him before - He and I were young and ruthless,
Crazy in love, absolutely relentless.
I thought love was unity of body and soul.
I thought I was smart, absolutely in control.

Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t make a mistake,
My love was true, nothing was fake.
We were responsible adults, yet it didn’t work out.
It meant everything to me, yet now, I’m living without.

And then you came, like a prince on a horse,
To begin a lifetime of romance, like a fairy-tale ofcourse.

You decided to wait till we tied the knot.
In our roller-coaster ride, I almost forgot.
I wanted to be truthful, keep every promise,
Shouldn’t THAT be a marriage’s basis?

I believe in God, have love for Him in my heart
Baseless religious beliefs mean nothing to me from the start.
Sex, to me, was a part of love,
A natural consequence created by the Lord above.

I don’t wish to erase it all with a magic wand
But I’m all yours now, I wish you’d understand.

Our beliefs differ, but our values remain the same,
I won’t make excuses ‘coz they all seem lame.
You’ve asked for time, that I’ll give,
I won’t apologise, ‘coz there’s nothing to forgive.

Yes, I had pre-marital sex and it was a big deal.
I was in love; loved how he made me feel.
It wasn’t as if I slept with every other guy,
If that’s what you conclude, then I guess it’s a goodbye.

I’m a loyal, passionate and caring person, that’s how I’m always going to be.
Sex before marriage doesn’t determine my morals, and I won’t EVER let it define me.

This poem is written for a contest on IndiBlogger where bloggers have to give their opinion on pre-marital sex. The entries will be judged by Poonam Uppal who has recently written a book called A Passionate Gospel of True Love : A Mystical True Love Story. You can order your copy here

The last few days - Snippets from Mumbai

It’s a beautiful Sunday morning. As I sit by the window sipping my tea and enjoying the golden rays of the winter sun, I'm thinking of the days gone by. It has been such an eventful month and I just have to let you all know about it.

To tell you the truth, I was extremely skeptical about December. Traveling alone is a huge challenge for me - physically. It might not seem so hard on the outside, but it makes me very anxious. I also know that there is nothing that I can’t do; still, it seems like an uphill task whenever I have to do anything alone.

Anyway, I set on a journey to Mumbai at the end of November. One of my favorite cousins, N,  was about to get married and I wanted to be a part of her big day. Although the wedding was a week away, I went a few days earlier because I didn’t want to be just a guest. I could have easily gone with the Boy who came for the three important days, but no, I took the ‘challenge’ and just went ahead. I’m so proud of that.

As soon as we landed N’s younger sister Meera, who remains my bestest cousin, picked me up from the airport and we straightaway went to have gol gappas! Oh, what joy! The rest of the evening was spent catching up with family members and the usual pre-shaadi merriment.

The next few days went by in a jiffy. N is still pursuing her MD and so, there were quite a few last minute chores. We went for shopping, lunching and random loafing around.

Dance practices have become the most important part of weddings and this one was no exeption. N and Meera are the most fabulous dancers I know. It was a delight to see them dance on Madhuri numbers. But my favourite were a gang of NRI aunts who had come from different parts of the world to attend N’s wedding. Most of them were childhood friends of N’s mother. Looking at them made me feel hopeful. I now know what I would be doing some 20 years from now when my closest friend’s children get married. Till a few years back only relatives were a part of the big fat Indian wedding. As the times are changing, friends have become as important as blood relatives, probably more significant. I’m so glad that I have my share of unconditional love as well..

So we were put up in this luxurious hotel for the main 3 days. The Boy joined in from Bahrain to attend his first wedding in the Punjabi khandaan. He’s an introvert, and for him this wedding was a big pain! His college friends and booze helped him get through these tough times!!


In between all the wedding hoopla came our 6th wedding anniversary. We took a break from relatives and had yummy grub at Taj Land Ends. Since we had a lunch invite as well, we went for 15 minutes to show our faces. There was a surprise cake awaiting us which made me feel so special. Needless to say, I love sooooo many people from my extended family.

Like all vidais, this one was deeply emotional as well. My aunt, uncle and Meera cried their hearts out seeing one of them leave their abode. Theirs is one of the most closely knit families I know and so, it broke my heart as well. But this is how it works - women get married and leave their parent’s home. No matter how long it has been since they left their home to study/work, getting married and knowing that now they will have to accept and be accepted in a new home, is always an emotionally draining experience. The more I think about it, the more weird this custom sounds to me…

The Boy left after the wedding festivities were over. However, my journey was not over yet. I had to go to Lucknow to attend yet another wedding. This one was as glamourous and as Big as an Indian wedding can get. Although I can keep writing, I’d leave that post for tomorrow! I think I’ll have to post every day now to talk about my last few days. It has been THAT long since I’ve been here.

You guys were definitely missed :)